Prank War
by twilover6638
Summary: BXE AXJ RXEM have a prank war. Its guys against girls, and each side is determined to win, to make it harder the girls say no kissing the enemy. Which side will give into their needs first? How long will this go one? You will laugh till you pee! All human
1. Chapter 1

**Hi, this story is going to basically a prank war between Bella, Edward, Alice, Jasper, Rose, and Emmett. It's going to be really funny, so I hope you enjoy it! If you're wondering why its rated M, it's because there are some bad words, and I plan on having some lemony teasing later on ;) **

**I'm not really sure how long it will be, but probably around 20 chapters because I just have so many funny prank ideas.**

**Enjoy!**

**:)**

**I don't own Twilight.**

**BPOV**

I got out of bed this morning and groaned! In one week it will be April Fool's day. Back home at Forks, it wasn't really a big deal. No one pulled pranks on each other, but this year I'm attending Green Meadow Academy, which is a boarding school, and I just happened to have Emmett Cullen as one of my best friends.

My boyfriend, (Edward Cullen) my best girlfriends, (Alice Cullen, who is also my roommate and Rosalie Hale) and my other best friend (Jasper, who is also Alice's boyfriend) warned me about Emmett. Apparently April's Fools day is his FAVORTIE day of the year, it's just another excuse to pull pranks and get on our nerves.

So anyway Edward, Alice, Rose, Jasper, and I decided that we weren't going to get scared shitless by Emmett. We are going to fight back!

The five of us have one week to prepare for Emmett and his pranks. And we were going to start off with something simple.

"Bellllaaaaaa!" Alice sang from my closet.

I grumbled.

"We have to get ready to prank Emmett! And be on the lookout, he starts his pranks one week early." She threw me some white shorts and a dark blue tank. "Get ready, were meeting the boys in 30!"

After I was ready to go, Rose came by our dorm. She said it wasn't safe for her out there alone.

"If you want Rose you can stay with us in our dorm? Just until this prank this is over." I suggested.

"That would be great!" She picked up two suitcases. _Wait where did those come from????_ And set them inside by our couch. She noticed my staring and smiled sheepishly. "Well, if you didn't offer, I was going to have to insist! It's not safe at my dorm! Emmett has a key!"

I chuckled, "It's fine Rose, mi casa es su casa."

"Huh?" Rose and Alice said at the same time.

"It means my house is your house, now let's go!" I grabbed their hands and ran them out the door.

We met the guys at a Starbucks on campus.

"Hello beautiful." Edward whispered in my ear which caused me to shiver and blush. He put his strong arms around my waist and nuzzled his nose into my neck.

"Hi." I squeaked.

Everyone chuckled at us. I looked around at our table and noticed someone missing,

Emmett.

Damn it!

**EPOV**

Okay so earlier this week Jasper and I told the girls that we would all stick together against Emmett.

Well we lied.

I hate lying to Bella, but a man's got to do what a man's got to do. And right now, while lying to Bella, I'm trying to save my ass, and in a sense her too.

I groaned, _wow does she have a perfect, round, tight, cute butt, focus Edward!_ Anyway if I see all the pranks that Emmett is going to pull, then I can save them from my beautiful girlfriend.

So right now Jasper and I are waiting for the girls to meet us at Starbucks, while Emmett goes and sneaks into their rooms to install the hidden cameras.

I know it's wrong, like if they're changing or something, but come on! We have already seen it all.

So back to the hidden cameras, Emmett is installing them because we want to see the looks on their faces after our pranks.

My phone buzzed right on cue.

_The girls just left, I'm goin in!_

_-Em_

_K. Good Luck. We can stall them for bout an hour._

_-E_

"Hey Jazz, that was Em. He said the girls just left and he is going to "Put the birds in the cage'" Jazz and I chuckled. Emmett was the one who wanted code names, for _everything_.

Just then the love of my life walked in.

**EMPOV**

Haha!!!!! I can't believe those girls thought that Edward and Jasper were in on their little girly pranks! Right now I'm hiding behind a tree outside the girl's dorm, waiting for them to leave so I can install these hidden cameras.

I plan on putting them everywhere, well except the bathroom. Not that I don't want to see, it's just Rose would be really pissed if I was watching her take a shit.

Not even five minutes late I saw Rose, Bella, and Alice leave the dorm building and head to Starbucks.

I got out my phone and texted Edward that the girls were leaving and I was going in.

I ran into the dorms and went straight to their room. I reached into my pocket and got the key Jasper gave me and ducked inside.

First I put a camera on the nightstands, the TV, the kitchen, and right outside the bathroom. I also put a one sound recording device in by the couch. While I was implanting it under the coffee table I got a text.

_The girls are about to leave, you have 15 mins to get out!_

_-E_

And with that I grabbed my bag, locked the door, and headed back to my place.

**APOV**

I knew something was up when Emmett didn't meet us for coffee. Jasper said he was sick, but come one! Do they really think were that stupid?

Anyway the guys said they were stay with Emmett for about a week.

"Well, Eddie and I are going to stay with Emmett this week." Jasper said looking down at me. I knew Jasper was keeping something from me, but I didn't question him.

I saw Bella's eyes narrow at Edward.

"But we are supposed to be pulling pranks against him!" She said fiercely.

"I know love, we are." Edward said back to her, but he was lying and I knew it! He didn't look her in the eyes which is the tell tale sign that someone is lying.

Bella looked at me and raised an eyebrow silently saying 'that was bull shit'.

The rest of the time we talked about our upcoming finals, but I could _feel_ something was up. Emmett wasn't here for a reason, and it's because he is doing some kind of prank.

But if Jasper and Edward knew then why would they just step out and let them do it? And why were they lying to us? And why were they staying with Emmett? It's almost as if they are trying to distract us- My internal debate was cut off by Bella.

"Alice, are you there?" She asked waving a hand in my face.

"Yeah, just thinking." I responded then got back to my theories.

So Jasper and Edward are defiantly distracting us, but why? Unless…

_GASP!_

They are working with Emmett!!!!!!

I don't know for sure, but I have a gut feeling Jasper and Edward skimped out on us, and are working with Emmett.

Either way, we have to be extremely cautious when we get home.

**BPOV**

Something is going on, and I could tell Alice just figured it out by the way her lips curled up into a smile, then backed down into a scowl.

Edward had been acting weird and Jasper seemed a little jumpy. Plus Emmett wasn't even here!!!!

For all we know he could be in our rooms right now!

OMG!!!!!!!

Wait no, he doesn't have a key.

_Whoosh_, that was a close one. Just imagine all the things Emmett could do if he had a key to our dorm. Hmm. That reminds me, I have a key to Edwards and Jaspers dorm, so Rose must have a key to Emmett's!

Eureka!

"Hey Rose," I whispered into her ear.

"Yeah?"

"Don't you have a key to Emmett's dorm?" I whispered so low that no one could hear me, but her.

Rose just smiled and nodded.

* * *

We started to head back to our dorm, being extremely cautious. Once we reached I door I turned to give Edward a goodbye peck, but he quickly made it into a passionate kiss.

He licked my bottom lips asked for accesses and I gave it to him happily. Then one of his arms came around to the small of my back pushing me into him, while the other caressed my face. My hands were tugging on his gorgeous bronze hair pulling him toward me. And I started to feel a familiar feeling in my stomach. Then we were interrupted by an evil little pixie.

We both pulled apart gasping for air, and Alice chuckled. "Jeez, Edward could you just not try to suck of Bella's face for once?"

"Sorry, but that might be that last kiss I get for a long time." He mumbled looking down.

I reached out and lifted his chin to look into his eyes. "What are you talking about?" I asked my eyes narrowing.

"Nothing." He bent down to give me a quick peck, "I love you babe, so you later." Then he and Jasper walked away.

Once inside I turned to Alice and Rose.

"Something is up!" I said.

"Wait you guy, lets whisper." Alice whispered. Rose and I gave her a questioning look. She rolled her eyes "I think Emmett was here earlier, and I don't want him to hear what we are saying."

And then my mind put it together. Edward and Jasper are working with Emmett and were trying to distract us! While Emmett did something in our room! He might have bugged it!

Just as I thought that I saw a little black device about the same size of my pinkie nail on top of our TV.

I gasped.

"Bella?" Rose and Alice asked in unison.

"I know." Then I whispered them my theory. Rose looked like something clicked in her mind, yet Alice looked expectant.

"I already figured it out." She whispered.

Then I told them to look on top of the TV.

They both gasped.

"The war has just begun girls." I whispered.

**I hope that you liked it so far! I also have another story, but this one is way more fun to write! I plan on updating very soon! And I swear that in the next few chapters you will be laughing so hard you will piss yourself. Anyway please review than tell me what you think! **

**Oh and if you have any idea's for pranks, feel free to tell me!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hi I hope you all enjoyed my first chapter, and I hope you like this one too! My best friend and I have been coming up with ideas and I can't wait to try them out! I also have another story too called The First Time for Everything, and I'm sorry I haven't updated it recently. I'm having writers block for it. Anyway I'm really excited for this story! Please review and tell me what you think!**

**:)**

**I don't own Twilight**

**EPOV**

I knew Bella knew something was wrong with me, but I was just so nervous for lying to her. I was just waiting for her to yell at me screaming saying I was a liar and a traitor.

_Damn guilt_

I think Rose and Alice were figuring it out too. Rose had a look of concentration on her face, while Alice's eyebrows furrowed till finally she shot Jasper and me a look that was pure annoyance.

After walking the girls back to the dorm, Jazz and I stopped by the store to get what we needed.

"Hey, do you think is right? You know turning our backs on them? They might get really pissed! And maybe break up with us!" Jasper was jumpy and I could tell he was just imagining what would happen if he lost Alice. He would be almost as frantic as me if I lost my Bella.

"No they wouldn't do that, Alice loves you man. And seconded, I know what we're doing is totally fucked up, and yes they will be pissed as hell. But we can't back out now, Emmett would kill us." I said as we walked through the threshold of the door. We bought the fake hair, sleeping pills, and other items, and then headed back to Emmett's.

We decided on staying at Emmett's for the rest of the week, so we could all spy on the girls. Especially Bella, I didn't want Emmett checking her out while she was changing or anything.

When we got there I saw Emmett's huge figure sitting on his bed with a laptop. The laptop was hooked up with the cameras in the girl's room.

"Em, what are they doing?" Jasper asked while putting our supplies away and heading for the laptop.

"Well, they were talking for a while and now they are all on Bella's bed." Emmett said looking down, with a guilty expression on his face.

"What are they doing on Bella's bed?" I asked, very frustrated, I mean it's not like they were-

"Fuck, Em! Don't watch that!" Jasper yelled.

I ran to the bed in half a second.

There on the screen was my Bella, my beautiful innocent Bella looking at a Playboy with Alice and Rose.

I got hard instantly.

"Emmett! WHAT THE HELL?" I yelled!

"What, come on man that is fucking hot." He shrugged.

I took out my phone to call Bella, even though I could clearly see the desire on her face while looking though the pages.

The phone rang, and on the screen I saw all the girls look at each other and I saw Alice smirk.

Bella picked up the phone on the screen, and I moved over to the couch.

"Hello?"

"Hey, do you want to go out tonight?" After seeing Bella looking at a Playboy I just had to have her.

"Umm, well I would love too; accept Rose and Alice won't let me." She said nervously.

_They wouldn't fucking let her???? Why the hell not?_

"Why?" I whined.

"We have plans, and umm, I have to go. Love you." And with that she hung up.

I closed my phone and stared at the screen and saw Bella talking to Rose and Alice but I couldn't hear anything.

"Em! Turn up the fucking volume!" I yelled, frustrated that Bella said no to our date.

"Jeez, someone's not getting sex tonight." He smirked.

I growled at him while he turned up the volume like I asked.

"Well, I really want to go, but if he did switch sides and is with Emmett, then…" She trailed off looking sad. It broke my heart.

"Oh he is! And Jasper too! We are so going to prank them tomorrow!" Alice was determined.

"What did you have in mind?" Rose asked with an evil glint in her eyes.

"Well I need to shave my legs, let's talk about it in the bathroom." Alice said and the girls followed after her.

"Did you put a camera in the bathroom?" I asked Emmett.

"Hell no, Rosie wouldn't talk to me for weeks if she found out!"

"Guys, the girls are going to get us bad, I just know it." Jasper was shaking his head and rubbing his temples.

"It's okay guys; we'll just put our plan into action tonight." I said. I don't want to prank Bella, but I'm going to get Rose and Alice so bad for not letting me get my Bella tonight.

"Game on!" Emmett bellowed.

**BPOV**

So since the guys put the cameras in the room, we decided to pull a mini prank on them. Why is it mini you ask? Well, because it's not as half as bad as what they're going to get later. Alice, Rose and I already went to the store to get our supplies.

First we went to the electronics to get hidden cameras and all sorts of other gadgets that we might need later on. Next we headed over to Target to get dyes, bleach, and itching powder. I thought we were finished till Alice and Rose brought me to the mall.

"Why are we here?" I whinnied while walking into the mall, well more like being forced. Alice and Rose were practically dragging me in.

"Because, Bella we want to look extra sexy for the guys." Alice said with a smirk.

"What? I thought that we were having a no kissing *cough sex* rule until this is over?" I really didn't like that rule. I needed my daily dose of Edward.

"We are, that's why we are going to look sexy." Rose explained. "After seeing us they are going to want us sooooo bad, but we can't give in."

* * *

After we got back Alice handed me a Playboy.

I raised an eyebrow.

"I know, I know, but I just wanted to mess with them a little." She said we a sheepish grin.

"If you want we can cover up the pictures with paper." Rose suggested, sensing that I was uncomfortable.

"It's fine."

"Okay, well lets all go on Bella's bed and girls… look like you want it." Alice said, than we stepped inside and changed into our pajama bottoms and tank tops. We all matched except we had different colors.

After half an hour of looking at the Playboy together, my phone rang.

"Hello?" Rose looked up, and I saw Alice run her hand through her hair and smirk.

"Hey, do you want to go out tonight?" Edward asked seductively. I bet he doesn't even know how sexy his voice sounds.

"Umm, well I would love too; accept Rose and Alice won't let me." This was my part, I was suppose to act nervous and clueless.

_Even though I really want him right now._

"Why?" He whined and I smiled, he must really want me.

"We have plans, and umm, I have to go. Love you." I had to hang up, or else I might change my mind about the no kissing rule.

"What did Edward want?" Rose asked, even though she knew the answer. We all had to play a part.

"He probably wants Bella to go out duh!" Alice said sounding exasperated. Damn she's good.

"Well, I really want to go, but if he did switch sides and is with Emmett, then…" I railed off trying to look sad.

"Oh he is! And Jasper too! We are so going to prank them tomorrow!" Alice was determined.

"What did you have in mind?" Rose asked with an evil glint in her eyes.

"Well I need to shave my legs, let's talk about it in the bathroom." Alice said as we followed after her.

After searching the bathroom, we found that there were no cameras in there. And for that I'm grateful.

We walked in and Alice closed the door.

"We were great! We should be in a movie." Alice said while giving Rose and me a high five.

"I know! Okay so here's the plan." Rose said while sitting on the floor. "First, Bella and I will get the guys out of the apartment. Bella will say that she missed Edward, or something like that and we will take them out to dinner. Alice when we walk out of this bathroom, say that you're going shopping but really go over to Emmett's to put in the cameras and our prank. Then you will have 1 hour Alice, that's all we can guarantee." Alice nodded. "Then you will head back to the apartment and we will meet you here. Got it?"

"Yes Rose, it's brilliant!" I said then we walked out to get our plan in action.

**EPOV**

Bella and Rose called later to say that they wanted to go out to dinner with us because Alice was going shopping.

I decided that Alice probably went shopping to get the supplies for whatever the girls were planning for us.

Either way I was just happy to have my Bella with me again.

Em, Jazz, Rose, Bella, and I were all sitting at a table at the burger joint on campus. I was trying really hard not to grab Bella and take her right there; she just looked so damn sexy! She was wearing tight jeans that hugged her beautiful curves and a tight dark blue top.

And on top of all that, while we were eating she kept her hand on my thigh and was inching it up to where I wanted it the most. I was very uncomfortable in my jeans. Bella saw me squirm in my seat, and I know that she saw the bulge in my jeans because she smirked

Since Bella and I were sitting so close I felt her phone vibrate.

She looked at the text before responding, and then put it away. I saw her and Rose exchange a glance.

"Who was that? Not a secret boyfriend I hope." I teased while bringing her into my arms.

"Nope, just Alice, she said she is going to be home in about half an hour to get her some fries." Bella said while placing her hand back on my thigh and rubbing. I almost let out a moan.

The rest of dinner went the same; I couldn't really focus on anything, because of the sexy women teasing me. Jasper already put the sleeping pills in their drinks, and they would be out as soon as they got home. Including the milkshake he got Alice.

Once we got to the girls dorm Alice was waiting for us. Jazz and I said our goodbyes, and headed back to Emmett's to watch them. But on the way, I just couldn't help but feel sad that Bella didn't give me a kiss goodbye.

After watching the girls for about half an hour they all yawned and went into a deep sleep.

Time to put our plan in action!

Jazz, Em, and I snuck into their room and found that they were in a deep sleep. Hmm, Jasper must have put a lot of medicine in their drinks.

We each went to our significant other and started our prank. We grabbed their hair and gently put it into the bald caps that we bought. Next we got the fake hair and spread it messily around their pillows and floor, then finally got an electric slaver and put it next to Alice's bed.

We step back to observe our work, and I couldn't help but feel a little guilty.

From the little bit of light from the window we could see our plan was excellent! The girls looked weird without hair, but my Bella was still beautiful. She looked so peaceful when she slept.

_Well you better enjoy it!_ I thought _she is going to be furious tomorrow! _

We went back to the dorm to get some sleep because we wanted to be there for the big unveiling.

"Dude, they are so gonna freak!" Em said while getting into his bed.

"I know. I'm scared." Jasper said.

"Me too." I mumbled then drifter off to sleep.

I was having a wonderful dream about Bella,

_I have dreams about Bella all the time, and just when this one was getting good..._

I was awakened by my alarm.

After we got ready we headed to the girls to see our plan in action.

We waited outside the door, till we heard an ear piercing screens and unintelligible shouts a, "I can't believe those mother fuckers!" It was Rosalie. "Im going to kill them!" Alice. And "Why would Edward do this? My hair!" My Bella screamed.

We walked in to see our three murderous girlfriends.

Shit!

**Haha I hoped you liked it! This has been my longest yet! Over 2,400 words! (Even though it is only the second) Anyway I hoped you liked this chapter! And don't worry the girls are going to get the boys back! The next chapter will have some funny pranks. By the way, if any of you have read my other story, you will recognize Edwards dream. It's the exact same. Sorry if you wanted something new, or just didn't like it, but I couldn't help myself! ;)**

**Please review!**


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